I have a playing test and an English quiz tomorrow but I don't feel like going to sleep yet. In fact I feel pretty... unhappy.
I don't know why. But I'm definitely unhappy. Not a defined unhappy-for-a-reason but definitely unhappy.
We're... different. And I guess it sort of pressures me.
So ridiculous. So ridiculous. Nothing to freak out about like this. Her way is even more... I don't know. My way is so timid, so inferiority-complex-like. But... is that why?
Meh.
Today ne.
Woke up, was cold all morning, went to a church called The Waters. It was all right--very long, but this was an introductory service... hmm... Came home and had grilled cheese. Good stuff. Following that we went to Grandma&Grandpa's house again. (It took me like five tries to find that ampersand in the dark. Geez.) I spent the way there re-reading scenes from King of Attolia (again?!) and plotting that dance scene picture I was talking about. Also shading Midna. Played cribbage there, and I was on the winning team once! In fact I... counted...? the winning points! I still say that game's more effort than it's worth though. XP On the way home I re-read some more, slept, and then realized that maybe the dancing picture wasn't as hopeless as I was thinking, so I continued it. I have rough outlines on scratchpaper and will continue it soon. Wish me luck!
Still don't feel like sleeping.
I might as well though. Good night.
9.08.2007
Which contains much babbling about Attolia.
Today I finished re-reading Queen of Attolia. I still have no idea what kind of picture to draw for them. T_T Why do all of their best scenes occur when Gen is HURT? It's so annoying! I would fail miserably at drawing hurt people! Gah! *rantrantrave*
Umm... after that, I... What on earth did I do all morning? Oh, I watched some of Howl's Moving Castle. Only up to the green slime. Beyond that I have a hard time bearing it. It's just so... different from the book. Completely different. :X Also Miyazaki clearly despises war with all his heart. Oh well. At least it's pretty and Howl is still funny. (Though I wish I hadn't seen it in English first. I keep getting the English voices in my head, especially Calcifer's.) Gen reminds me of Howl sometimes. "My insides may become my outsides..." xD
In the afternoon I went to my sisters' soccer game. They won. It was cold. I started drawing a Lolita girl before the game and added to it during. Also I started shading that one picture of Midna... currently trying to figure out if her hair or her skin should get a darker tone. Will have to re-beat Ganondorf AGAIN to try to do the details on the crown... again... Then there was a potluck. Delicious. Then we came home; everyone but me watched The Office and I came on the internet. Sakeko and Snuffles were on! But then Snuffles disappeared without alerting me. XD Then later I ran off, ate popcorn, and watched a bit of Office until Michael got too painful (didn't take long!). Following that I went downstairs to start a new TP file. Again. Eheheh. I'm trying to do a "speed run." Either that or I'm trying to do a "three-heart challenge." Either that or I'm just trying to validate replaying it by calling it something special. Take your pick.
...I want to write something for them, or I want to draw something for them. The dancing scene... perhaps... mrrrrr. Marglebop. That's my new random noise.
Would you like me to teach you a game? It's called Bop-Bop-Biddily-Bop.
Everyone stands in a circle, but there's one person in the middle. That one person meanders about, and, at random, he/she goes up to someone and says "Bop-Bop-Biddily-Bop!" Before he/she finishes, the person he/she went up to has to say "Bop!" in return. If that person doesn't manage, that person is now in the middle and the first person is part of the circle.
Umm... after that, I... What on earth did I do all morning? Oh, I watched some of Howl's Moving Castle. Only up to the green slime. Beyond that I have a hard time bearing it. It's just so... different from the book. Completely different. :X Also Miyazaki clearly despises war with all his heart. Oh well. At least it's pretty and Howl is still funny. (Though I wish I hadn't seen it in English first. I keep getting the English voices in my head, especially Calcifer's.) Gen reminds me of Howl sometimes. "My insides may become my outsides..." xD
In the afternoon I went to my sisters' soccer game. They won. It was cold. I started drawing a Lolita girl before the game and added to it during. Also I started shading that one picture of Midna... currently trying to figure out if her hair or her skin should get a darker tone. Will have to re-beat Ganondorf AGAIN to try to do the details on the crown... again... Then there was a potluck. Delicious. Then we came home; everyone but me watched The Office and I came on the internet. Sakeko and Snuffles were on! But then Snuffles disappeared without alerting me. XD Then later I ran off, ate popcorn, and watched a bit of Office until Michael got too painful (didn't take long!). Following that I went downstairs to start a new TP file. Again. Eheheh. I'm trying to do a "speed run." Either that or I'm trying to do a "three-heart challenge." Either that or I'm just trying to validate replaying it by calling it something special. Take your pick.
...I want to write something for them, or I want to draw something for them. The dancing scene... perhaps... mrrrrr. Marglebop. That's my new random noise.
Would you like me to teach you a game? It's called Bop-Bop-Biddily-Bop.
Everyone stands in a circle, but there's one person in the middle. That one person meanders about, and, at random, he/she goes up to someone and says "Bop-Bop-Biddily-Bop!" Before he/she finishes, the person he/she went up to has to say "Bop!" in return. If that person doesn't manage, that person is now in the middle and the first person is part of the circle.
9.07.2007
The Weary
Iron Man is in my head. It's one of our pep band songs.
So today was decent... in econ, we started a stock-trading game; in English, we talked about the first few chapters of Brave New World and started a vocab pre-test. It was kinda fun. I'm starting to really like College English. During free period today I read Queen of Attolia. Hmmm... I wonder, have I mentioned that I love those books? Yes. I think I have. Multiple times. To the extent that it's annoying. xD Band was... the usual. Gonna totally fail the chair placement audition. Oh well. Maybe later I'll challenege, but maybe I'll be too lazy.
Ummm... I'm going to try this. It's for the [/Hyrule], but it'll be backstory, probably. I... I dunno. We'll see how this goes.
--
"What is it, elder sisters? You do not look well."
(They look smaller than he remembers, and less radiant. Now they pause before answering him, as if unwilling. Farore speaks.) "Hyrule is going to end soon."
(He swallows.) "End?"
(Mute, Nayru nods.)
"My people...?"
(Farore again.) "They are yet intricately tied to Hyrule. With its end they will fall, though that which you call the Twilight Realm will remain."
(Jindal stares in disbelief. The goddesses--surely they could do something--)
"There is nothing we could do." (Nayru has read his thoughts.) "We have lost much of our power; Hyrule has forgotten us. And even had we our true power, we could not stop this. All worlds end." (Her eyes are the saddest he has ever seen them.)
(Din has not yet spoken. The fire is gone from her eyes and her posture is hunched.)
"Is it Ganondorf?" (Jindal ventures softly.)
"Yes." (Din answers him after a moment, bitterness in her voice.) "Ganondorf blessed by Power will put an end to our world, and I can do nothing."
(Nayru takes her hand and Farore clasps her shoulder. Din sighs. Was it proper for Jindal to feel sorry for her, a being so much greater than himself?)
"There is yet hope," (Nayru comforts him.) "My Princess and Farore's Hero will survive Hyrule's fall. And your Princess will, also."
(Jindal does not voice his confusion, only tilts his head to the side.)
"Ganondorf will attempt to invade the Twilight--you must warn your Princess of that," (Farore instructs him.) "And if you warn her, the power of the Fused Shadows will awake in her, and she will be able to halt Ganondorf at the Mirror."
"And with the power of the Shadows, she will save Hyrule's Chosen Ones. And can you guess where she will take them?" (It takes effort for Jindal not to sigh in relief--flame dances back into Din's eyes as she asks the question, certain of her superiority.)
(And he has a guess, but--it would be impossible. Such a thing--but if it were to be true--his heart quickens.)
"Yes, Jindal," (Farore answers softly.) "The Fused Shadows will fulfill their intended purpose once more. She will take them to the Sacred Realm--with our blessing."
(Jindal shivers--and suddenly he finds himself in tears, bawling as he hadn't since the night he realized his parents were gone and his tribe in a strange land.)
"Why do you weep?" (Nayru.)
(He doesn't know why. Joy that one of his people should reach the Sacred Realm at last? Despair at how long it had taken? Relief at this sign of forgiveness for the sin that he had taken part of?)
"I weep with awe, elder sisters," (he says finally.) "You have known always?"
"Always," (Nayru answers tenderly.)
(For a while longer, he cries, his face in his hands, and finally he raises his head to look at the goddesses.) "I am weary," (he tells them.) "May I sleep again?"
(The goddesses look at him with sympathy.) "Soon," (Farore says.) "You must warn your Princess first. Then speak to your court, and those who wish to sleep again may come to us."
(When he returns, he is alone. He grimaces wryly and gestures at the empty space around him.) "It's cowardly of me, isn't it? To abandon my people? My court was always stronger than I."
(Nayru draws near and lays a hand on his brow.) "You have known more than they have," (she tells him,) "and to know is a heavy burden." There is nothing to be ashamed of; you have served your people well. Do you wish to sleep?"
"A question first." (He cannot stop himself from asking.) "Have I been a tool?"
(All three goddesses shake their heads.) "You have been a player," (Din answers him.) "A player in the game that we started and we have watched."
"All right,"(he whispers.) "All right. I can accept that." (He is ashamed still--but he is so tired. He is full, full to the brim, full with love for his people and with awe for the goddesses.) "Good night, elder sisters."
(Jindal closes his eyes, and the goddesses loose his soul from the sleepless immortality they had given him long ago.)
"Good night, little brother."
So today was decent... in econ, we started a stock-trading game; in English, we talked about the first few chapters of Brave New World and started a vocab pre-test. It was kinda fun. I'm starting to really like College English. During free period today I read Queen of Attolia. Hmmm... I wonder, have I mentioned that I love those books? Yes. I think I have. Multiple times. To the extent that it's annoying. xD Band was... the usual. Gonna totally fail the chair placement audition. Oh well. Maybe later I'll challenege, but maybe I'll be too lazy.
Ummm... I'm going to try this. It's for the [/Hyrule], but it'll be backstory, probably. I... I dunno. We'll see how this goes.
--
"What is it, elder sisters? You do not look well."
(They look smaller than he remembers, and less radiant. Now they pause before answering him, as if unwilling. Farore speaks.) "Hyrule is going to end soon."
(He swallows.) "End?"
(Mute, Nayru nods.)
"My people...?"
(Farore again.) "They are yet intricately tied to Hyrule. With its end they will fall, though that which you call the Twilight Realm will remain."
(Jindal stares in disbelief. The goddesses--surely they could do something--)
"There is nothing we could do." (Nayru has read his thoughts.) "We have lost much of our power; Hyrule has forgotten us. And even had we our true power, we could not stop this. All worlds end." (Her eyes are the saddest he has ever seen them.)
(Din has not yet spoken. The fire is gone from her eyes and her posture is hunched.)
"Is it Ganondorf?" (Jindal ventures softly.)
"Yes." (Din answers him after a moment, bitterness in her voice.) "Ganondorf blessed by Power will put an end to our world, and I can do nothing."
(Nayru takes her hand and Farore clasps her shoulder. Din sighs. Was it proper for Jindal to feel sorry for her, a being so much greater than himself?)
"There is yet hope," (Nayru comforts him.) "My Princess and Farore's Hero will survive Hyrule's fall. And your Princess will, also."
(Jindal does not voice his confusion, only tilts his head to the side.)
"Ganondorf will attempt to invade the Twilight--you must warn your Princess of that," (Farore instructs him.) "And if you warn her, the power of the Fused Shadows will awake in her, and she will be able to halt Ganondorf at the Mirror."
"And with the power of the Shadows, she will save Hyrule's Chosen Ones. And can you guess where she will take them?" (It takes effort for Jindal not to sigh in relief--flame dances back into Din's eyes as she asks the question, certain of her superiority.)
(And he has a guess, but--it would be impossible. Such a thing--but if it were to be true--his heart quickens.)
"Yes, Jindal," (Farore answers softly.) "The Fused Shadows will fulfill their intended purpose once more. She will take them to the Sacred Realm--with our blessing."
(Jindal shivers--and suddenly he finds himself in tears, bawling as he hadn't since the night he realized his parents were gone and his tribe in a strange land.)
"Why do you weep?" (Nayru.)
(He doesn't know why. Joy that one of his people should reach the Sacred Realm at last? Despair at how long it had taken? Relief at this sign of forgiveness for the sin that he had taken part of?)
"I weep with awe, elder sisters," (he says finally.) "You have known always?"
"Always," (Nayru answers tenderly.)
(For a while longer, he cries, his face in his hands, and finally he raises his head to look at the goddesses.) "I am weary," (he tells them.) "May I sleep again?"
(The goddesses look at him with sympathy.) "Soon," (Farore says.) "You must warn your Princess first. Then speak to your court, and those who wish to sleep again may come to us."
(When he returns, he is alone. He grimaces wryly and gestures at the empty space around him.) "It's cowardly of me, isn't it? To abandon my people? My court was always stronger than I."
(Nayru draws near and lays a hand on his brow.) "You have known more than they have," (she tells him,) "and to know is a heavy burden." There is nothing to be ashamed of; you have served your people well. Do you wish to sleep?"
"A question first." (He cannot stop himself from asking.) "Have I been a tool?"
(All three goddesses shake their heads.) "You have been a player," (Din answers him.) "A player in the game that we started and we have watched."
"All right,"(he whispers.) "All right. I can accept that." (He is ashamed still--but he is so tired. He is full, full to the brim, full with love for his people and with awe for the goddesses.) "Good night, elder sisters."
(Jindal closes his eyes, and the goddesses loose his soul from the sleepless immortality they had given him long ago.)
"Good night, little brother."
9.06.2007
Congratulations! You have been spared angst.
Had I had time last night, I would have typed up the lovely little angstrant I wrote during my free PSEO period yesterday. Oh yes, it was filled with angst. I ate lunch alone yesterday--that's why. Never, ever, ever eat lunch alone in a school setting or similar if it can be avoided. Incredibly damaging to the [speech=laintalk]shuuke [/laintalk] [speech=normal]psyche. But I recovered from that unpleasantness due to the news that Megan Whalen Turner has three more Attolia books in mind! Kyaaaaaaah! You can't even imagine how happy this makes me, unless you're Snuffles, because she experienced both my angsting and my sudden BOING into joy.
So the deal on school:
First period is Economics of Social Issues. Looks like I'm going to actually think about things in this class, at least until I get more used to the nomenclature. theteacherstutters but I'm sure I'll get used to that. Not bad, just... noticeable.
Second period (technically I should be calling these blocks. You'll notice that I make no effort whatsoever to do so) is College English. We had our 1984 test today. I finished first by a lot. Alarmed some people. All in a day's work. XP
Third period is the period that's free for PSEO. Third period generally decides what lunch you eat in, based on the teacher. Therefore I get to decide my own lunch. So naturally I eat with R. G. And UGH. This means I'm in the library again. It's COLD THERE DANGITTT. And I'll need to figure out how to amuse myself. Yesterday of course I wrote that angstrant and started to read Firebirds Rising, an anthology of SF/Fantasy short stories. Reading it because there's a scholarship that I wouldn't mind collecting, involving writing a SF/fantasy short story. :/ I don't know if I'll be able to do it. I've got an idea right now, sort of... But it's not very put-together yet. Anyway, back to third period: I might keep that kanji workbook I have in school and drum Japanese into my mind while I'm there. But I need conversation practiiiiiiiiiiiice. And speaking in general.
Fourth period... the most nerve-wracking. Band. Or Wind Ensemble, rather, which I guess is more... advanced? Fancy? Upperclassmen-ish? I'm... jutting my jaw again, and I stick out because everyone else knows the ropes already, and was I always this awful at sight-reading? *Sigh* In any case, the class is split. I think I've finally figured out how it works.
Band and choir occur in the same period.
But some people are in band AND choir.
So, in the first half of the period, band has band, and the people who are ONLY choir have "Music Appreciation."
In the second half, choir has choir, and the people who are only in band have music appreciation.
Music appreciation... well, it's very nice, but it may make the music theory class I'm signed up for my new PSEO totally superfluous. But really it's fun. We listened to Wagner. :D *continues ridiculous Boogiepop-preference for Wagner* Also Duke Ellington. Music with... class. I need more of that.
I drew a picture today, so you get no writing. Sorry.
Oh, and last night, when I was TRYING to get to sleep EARLY, a picture popped into my head.
As described to Snuffles:
A fashionable girl, loose grey sweater, long black armwarmers, newsboy cap... pointing a gun.
Yeah.
She was totally oshare and totally pointing a gun. It was really weird.
So the deal on school:
First period is Economics of Social Issues. Looks like I'm going to actually think about things in this class, at least until I get more used to the nomenclature. theteacherstutters but I'm sure I'll get used to that. Not bad, just... noticeable.
Second period (technically I should be calling these blocks. You'll notice that I make no effort whatsoever to do so) is College English. We had our 1984 test today. I finished first by a lot. Alarmed some people. All in a day's work. XP
Third period is the period that's free for PSEO. Third period generally decides what lunch you eat in, based on the teacher. Therefore I get to decide my own lunch. So naturally I eat with R. G. And UGH. This means I'm in the library again. It's COLD THERE DANGITTT. And I'll need to figure out how to amuse myself. Yesterday of course I wrote that angstrant and started to read Firebirds Rising, an anthology of SF/Fantasy short stories. Reading it because there's a scholarship that I wouldn't mind collecting, involving writing a SF/fantasy short story. :/ I don't know if I'll be able to do it. I've got an idea right now, sort of... But it's not very put-together yet. Anyway, back to third period: I might keep that kanji workbook I have in school and drum Japanese into my mind while I'm there. But I need conversation practiiiiiiiiiiiice. And speaking in general.
Fourth period... the most nerve-wracking. Band. Or Wind Ensemble, rather, which I guess is more... advanced? Fancy? Upperclassmen-ish? I'm... jutting my jaw again, and I stick out because everyone else knows the ropes already, and was I always this awful at sight-reading? *Sigh* In any case, the class is split. I think I've finally figured out how it works.
Band and choir occur in the same period.
But some people are in band AND choir.
So, in the first half of the period, band has band, and the people who are ONLY choir have "Music Appreciation."
In the second half, choir has choir, and the people who are only in band have music appreciation.
Music appreciation... well, it's very nice, but it may make the music theory class I'm signed up for my new PSEO totally superfluous. But really it's fun. We listened to Wagner. :D *continues ridiculous Boogiepop-preference for Wagner* Also Duke Ellington. Music with... class. I need more of that.
I drew a picture today, so you get no writing. Sorry.
Oh, and last night, when I was TRYING to get to sleep EARLY, a picture popped into my head.
As described to Snuffles:
A fashionable girl, loose grey sweater, long black armwarmers, newsboy cap... pointing a gun.
Yeah.
She was totally oshare and totally pointing a gun. It was really weird.
9.05.2007
Psychosomatic, it's gotta be.
First day of school and I'm queasy. Probably just nervous. I have no idea how I'm going to find my classes. I mean it. No clue. Yikes. But if I really were sick, I'd miss the first day of school... again. After missing it ninth grade and eleventh grade. (Ninth grade may have been psychosomatic too, but if it was, then I gave myself a FEVER with worrying. Eleventh grade was, of course, so that my classes could be told what to expect with Billy.)
In any case, it has taken me an hour to get fully ready this morning. If I want to walk it needs to be half an hour, so I'm here to (a) kill time until it's time to go and (b) list things to speed it up.
I still need to figure out what I'll eat. Maybe an un-toasted bagel with cream cheese? Graham crackers with peanut butter (or cream cheese--don't look at me like that, it's delicious! Like cheesecake.)? A power bar! No thank you. I'll figure something out.
It's 7:04; my sisters aren't even up yet. (They probably should be. Z is up.) Eventually they'll get up and (time permitting) kick me off. In any case I may as well start my neopet dailies.
In any case, it has taken me an hour to get fully ready this morning. If I want to walk it needs to be half an hour, so I'm here to (a) kill time until it's time to go and (b) list things to speed it up.
- No green tea! Takes too long to boil water, wait for steeping, drink slowly because of heat.
- Eat breakfast in car on way home. What to bring?
- Have everything gathered. (I had to go looking for my flute.)
- Rush! (simple solution)
- Really. Have everything gathered, not just most of it.
- Like, in the backpack, all that's needed is to grab it. (I say this thrice because I have a horrible habit of saying "good enough" in situations like that.)
- Pick out clothes night before. (This won't fix today because I'd already decided, but it will help. Incidentally, I'm wearing my new, VERY scene-ish Cheshire-Cat-and-metallic-rainbow-rainbow-lightning shirt, dark blue jeans and denim vest, studded belt, and my new high-top canvas sneakers.)
I still need to figure out what I'll eat. Maybe an un-toasted bagel with cream cheese? Graham crackers with peanut butter (or cream cheese--don't look at me like that, it's delicious! Like cheesecake.)? A power bar! No thank you. I'll figure something out.
It's 7:04; my sisters aren't even up yet. (They probably should be. Z is up.) Eventually they'll get up and (time permitting) kick me off. In any case I may as well start my neopet dailies.
9.03.2007
100,723!
See my Twitter for the short version of my day. XD
Yup. Weird dreams, walkies, Grandparents' house--wasn't that bad, actually, but cribbage just strikes me as too much work--lots of King of Attolia (I love that book so much), plenty of internet. Am now registered for a music theory-type class at SCSU because the place I could have taken Japanese doesn't allow high schoolers. GAH. What a pain. I hope the music class isn't too easy.
So today, I tweaked a picture of Midna (v2.0! or... is it v1?) and began a picture of Eugenides and Attolia. (+squee) Hopefully that will go well. The picture of Midna has gone wonderfully, thank you for asking; that crown gidget of hers is a little (read: very) confusing but I suppose that means I shall have to re-beat Ganondorf and stare at that. Pff.
Umm... gonna attempt that fanfiction now. I don't know how it will work out. Bear with me. (However, please don't bare with me. In fact, if you're going to be bare, you'll be doing so alone.)
...It's not coming. Warii warii. ^^;
Yup. Weird dreams, walkies, Grandparents' house--wasn't that bad, actually, but cribbage just strikes me as too much work--lots of King of Attolia (I love that book so much), plenty of internet. Am now registered for a music theory-type class at SCSU because the place I could have taken Japanese doesn't allow high schoolers. GAH. What a pain. I hope the music class isn't too easy.
So today, I tweaked a picture of Midna (v2.0! or... is it v1?) and began a picture of Eugenides and Attolia. (+squee) Hopefully that will go well. The picture of Midna has gone wonderfully, thank you for asking; that crown gidget of hers is a little (read: very) confusing but I suppose that means I shall have to re-beat Ganondorf and stare at that. Pff.
Umm... gonna attempt that fanfiction now. I don't know how it will work out. Bear with me. (However, please don't bare with me. In fact, if you're going to be bare, you'll be doing so alone.)
...It's not coming. Warii warii. ^^;
9.02.2007
A cold and drowsy humor! D: *vomits on audience member*
Sooooooo we watched the Reduced Shakespeare Company DVD to-night. Twas awesome, naturally. Of course I had seen most of it--up to the intermission--in tenth grade English, but that doesn't change the fact that it's hilarious beyond all words.
So today I found a little thing called Twitter. It is right over <--there. (i.e., to the left of this entry.) You should totally join. In fact if you're reading this blog, chances are you received an email from me/Twitter inviting you. :D
Unless of course you randomly stumbled here. But if that's the case, I doubt very much that you got to the second paragraph of this entry, because this blog is about as inconsiquential as they come. (Yes, I'm finally admitting it.)
Other than that, I vaguely considered giving this entry a point, but earlier this afternoon, I started re-reading King of Attolia... again. xD I love it I love it I love it. Soo I'm cutting this a bit short so I can go read more of that :D
I have (another) Twilight Princess fanfiction idea but I'm currently in the middle of trying to decide whether or not it's worth writing.
Well then, back to Eugenides and Attolia and the poor guard Costis. xD <3
So today I found a little thing called Twitter. It is right over <--there. (i.e., to the left of this entry.) You should totally join. In fact if you're reading this blog, chances are you received an email from me/Twitter inviting you. :D
Unless of course you randomly stumbled here. But if that's the case, I doubt very much that you got to the second paragraph of this entry, because this blog is about as inconsiquential as they come. (Yes, I'm finally admitting it.)
Other than that, I vaguely considered giving this entry a point, but earlier this afternoon, I started re-reading King of Attolia... again. xD I love it I love it I love it. Soo I'm cutting this a bit short so I can go read more of that :D
I have (another) Twilight Princess fanfiction idea but I'm currently in the middle of trying to decide whether or not it's worth writing.
Well then, back to Eugenides and Attolia and the poor guard Costis. xD <3
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